Dear Baby #3,
You’re on your way, and my world is about to change. I couldn’t be more excited. I couldn’t be more nervous. I couldn’t be more sure and unsure all at the same time.
I’m unsure about a lot of little things. I am unsure of how I’m going to arrange three carseats in my SUV and how I will manage to get three little humans out of the house in the morning. I’m unsure of whether I’ll have baby #2 potty trained before you get here or whether we’ll have your nursery ready in time. I’m not totally sure how we will make it through the grocery store or get through cold and flu season. I don’t know what kind of shape the hand-me-downs will be or if the swing will still be working or if we should get a king-sized bed or if enough baby-proofing supplies even exist for a household of three children four and under.
I’m unsure about big things too. I’m unsure about how this delivery will go and whether you’ll take to nursing or not. I’m unsure what kind of sleeper you’ll be or if I’ll ever get a full night’s sleep again. I’m worried about adjusting our budget to afford daycare and whether working full-time is really something I’ll be able to handle. I’m unsure about how your dad and I will find time for date nights and how I’ll be able to give all my babies attention. I wonder if we should be looking for a bigger house or squeezing you into our starter home. I’m unsure about managing schedules and maintaining self-care.
Like any expecting parent, I have my worries and doubts, but since I’ve done this mom thing twice already, there are also some things I am very sure of. I am sure that you will be welcomed into a family that already loves you so much - a father who will play you his rock and roll lullabies and sisters who can’t wait to help change your diapers (or so they say now!). I’m absolutely certain that you will be read to every day and that you will be snuggled every night. I’m so sure that whether you’re happy or grumpy, giggling or screaming, you’ll be cared for and told you’re loved every single day. I am sure that you’ll be protected by our golden retriever and that you’ll know the lyrics to several Kiss songs by the age of 2. Above all, I am sure that I will have more than enough love for you - that the heart just has this beautiful way of expanding and growing for every new baby in a family. So despite all the things I’m unsure about, the things I am sure about easily overshadow my doubts.
Baby #3, you’re on your way, and my world is definitely changing, but when I think of meeting you and seeing your sweet face, when I think about seeing your father hold you for the first time or your sisters’ eyes lighting up when they walk into the hospital room, I know that all the things I’m unsure about pale in comparison to the biggest thing I am sure about - that my world is about to change for the better.
Love,
Mama
xxx