Dear Abigail,
Every year I sit down to write a birthday letter to you, it feels impossible. This seventh letter feels unbelievable. Somehow my heart both swells and sinks when I think about another year passing by, as I watch you grow more and more into a young lady. Over the past year, your desire for independence has grown exponentially. I am trying to take a step back and give you the opportunities you seek while still being close enough so that I’m within reach when you need me. It’s a tricky balance for a mother, but I promise I’m doing my best. Watching my firstborn grow is so exciting, and it’s also completely uncharted territory. So we will continue to work together. I will provide guidance where I can while following your cues. You are a natural born leader, and I know this seventh year will be full of watching you both rise and settle into yourself.
Your sixth year began with challenges. We spent another Christmas quarantined, then lost our beloved golden retriever, Harper, which meant lots of hard life conversations. As your Kindergarten year unfolded, you faced and overcame a major fear by learning to talk about your feelings and use some of your own coping strategies. Little by little, you were gaining the confidence to navigate hard things. We spent many nights sitting side by side, talking through whatever feelings were on your mind - practicing deep breathing and repeating positive affirmations. When spring came and the days grew longer, you began to shine brighter, too. Many of your worries began to subside and your sense of self-assurance began to rise. Hand over hand, you climbed to the ceiling of the gymnastics rope, earning your way into the monkey club. You stood on the front riser at your kindergarten graduation singing with pride in front of a huge audience. You flew down to first base after smacking the ball off the tee. You asked to go all by yourself to the campground park. You coolly started taking one hand off of your bicycle handlebars. You confidently picked out “your own style” clothes for the school year, and you marched onto the school bus in September like you were walking on sunshine.
As you strut on into this seventh year, I want to savor all the little things that have made your sixth year so special. I want to remember how proud you were when you completed your first 100 piece puzzle by yourself and how you drew individual valentines for your classmates because you knew something each person liked. I want to remember how many teeth you lost this year (five!) and how absolutely beautiful you looked on the night of the father-daughter dance. I want to remember watching you bravely jump from a fallen tree into the Saco River and learn to swim on your own. I want to remember you taking your digital camera with you everywhere, especially to catch the sunsets at the beach. I want to remember you cheering Grace on at tee ball and carrying Emmy around while you played family. I want to remember you reading Ivy + Bean, falling in love with the original Full House, hiding crystals under your pillow, wearing your hair with two pieces hanging down in the front, belting out Train’s “Hey Soul Sister,” and giggling with your girlfriends at your birthday brunch. I think I mostly want to remember the nights you still asked me to carry you to bed and the times you asked for a ten-second hug.
Your seventh year will bring more changes as our family grows yet again. But it will also bring more love. More memories. More independence. More light. I am so proud to have you leading the pack of our family. You are an incredibly strong-willed young girl with a kind, sensitive heart that will continue to serve as a strength. But don’t forget - no matter how old you are, I will always hug you for as long as you need.
Today we celebrate you, Abby! We celebrate the growth you’ve made and the joy you bring to absolutely everyone around you. The other day you asked me if I’m sad you’re getting older. “I’m not sad,” I told you. “I’m proud to watch you grow up - I just never want to forget all of the wonderful things about this age.” I have loved everything about you being six, and I look forward to loving all the things that come in your seventh year. You make me so proud, and I am so grateful to be your mom. I love you, I love you, I love you, birthday girl!
Love,
Mama
xxx